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Currently avoiding housework
Running late is my cardio
Probably late for something
Nap time is my happy hour
My hair is a mess to match my life
My brain has too many tabs open
Mother of the freakin year
Losing my mind one kid at a time
Lashes longer than my patience
I’m silently correcting your grammar
I’m not for everyone
I am not a hot mess i am spicy disaster
I speak fluent sarcasm
I may be wrong but i doubt it
Hold on let me overthink this
Everyone was thinking it i just said it
Cancel my subscriptions i am done with your issues
Another fine day ruined by adulthood